God is silent. Again.

Sometimes I feel like God's silence means I've done something wrong. I wonder if I'm being punished for something I've done. Throughout the day, I'm talking to Him, but still there is silence. Are you disappointed with my praise? Does this mean no to the things I've been asking you about? If you love me, why are you silent and feel so far away? These thoughts and a thousand more just like them are what happen in my head sometimes, even though I know the enemy would love nothing more than to create doubt in my mind about God. I know this to be true, and yet some days I wonder whether it is the enemy or if this is how I really feel deep down inside. It can feel sad and even scary, but here's the thing I know I need to keep reminding myself of: it's ok to be afraid sometimes, it’s ok to ask these questions. God isn't shocked, and I’m not about to be separated from His love over this. How do I know?

1 Peter 5:7 "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you."

1. He already knows what I’m feeling. 

Psalm 139:1(CEV) “You have looked deep into my heart, Lord, and you know all about me.”

 2. There are so many people in the bible that God used in tremendous ways who had some of these same feelings. 

Psalm 22:1-2 (ESV) David prays, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer, and by night, but I find no rest.”

3. God reassures me throughout the bible.

Matthew 28:20 (NLT) “Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

Romans 8:38-39 (NLT) “And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.”

Psalm 121:8 (NLT) “The Lord keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever.”

There are many more scriptures in God’s word that carry this same message. God shows me He already knows how I feel, He provides examples of those before me that have had the same experiences, and then He provides proof that He is always there. So, what do I do now? Well, one of the best examples of what comes next is found in the prayers of David. Though David expressed these same sentiments to God, he did something directly after that is a game-changer. He reminds himself of all the times that God has come through for him, and he gives God praise not just for what He’s done in the past but for who He is.

Psalm 77:11-15 (NLT) “But then I recall all you have done, O LORD; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago. They are constantly in my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works. O God, your ways are holy. Is there any god as mighty as you? You are the God of great wonders! You demonstrate your awesome power among the nations. By your strong arm, you redeemed your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.”

What's Next

1 Peter 5:7 says, "Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you." It’s ok to share your concerns and fears with God. When the silence feels loud, when God seems distant, this is the pattern to follow. I remind myself that faith means choosing to trust Him anyway. It’s laying my fears at His feet, reminding my soul of His faithfulness, and praising Him before the answers come. It’s believing that even in the waiting, He is working. Even in the silence, He is near.